Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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