I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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