Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize