His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize
