You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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