Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Randomize
