I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
