Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
