I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
