What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
