i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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