you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
So I just went to clothing optional bar
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
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