I hope my margaritas pass through security.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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