i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
