Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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