Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
and she was petting her beer can
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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