Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
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