I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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