hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
