i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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