its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Sober January is a disaster.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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