looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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