I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize