She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
