Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
