kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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