You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
