please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I have fence marks all over my body
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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