no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
