He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I don't want my vagina anymore.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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