peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
