Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
