There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
