I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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