Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
So I just went to clothing optional bar
COCAINE IS GR8
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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