We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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