it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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