operation harelip BJ is a go
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
