He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
