i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
