covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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