I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
