Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
