Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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