why didn't you poke me back
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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