Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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