"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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