How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I want her autograph on my taint
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Of course I have a pirate flag
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
