ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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