; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
